How To Build a Strong Marriage

How To Build a Strong Marriage: 7 Things To Consider

how to build a strong marriage

How To Strengthen Your Marriage Bond

This is all about how to build a strong marriage. And we all want that, right?

We hear a lot about happy marriages. Even healthy marriages. 

Let’s shine the spotlight on strong marriages. Marriages that feel sturdy. 

Relationships that are not easily toppled over by strong winds. 

Because the weather can not always be sunny and warm. 

Most of us can relate to the idea that there will not always be perfectly clear skies. 

This is where a focus on a strong marriage can really come in handy.

Having a strong foundation doesn’t mean your marriage will always be firing on all cylinders.

But building something strong leaves room for the more challenging times. 

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Here Are 7 Tips All About How To Build a Strong Marriage

1) Marriage Meetings

Yep, these are exactly what they sound like. No false or misleading advertising. 

Just meetings about your marriage. 

This is all about creating a safe space for you both to come open and willing and ready to listen to the other person.

And also willing to be completely honest and vulnerable. Easy, right?

Yikes. Not really. 

It is actually tough to be that open. To lay it all out. 

It’s tough to have uncomfortable conversations. 

But that is when true growth happens. 

Many times, relationships are not fully given a chance to improve, grow, or thrive. And some of this may be because brushing things under the rug is easier. Avoiding uncomfortable conversations is easier.

In the short term.

We all know how these methods pan out in the long haul. Spoiler alert… not great. 

A marriage meeting is a safe place and time to talk about hard things.

(Or not-so-hard things. Or funny things. Ok, basically anything goes) 

*I like to keep a notebook around to jot things down that need to be brought up at these meetings. If it’s not written down, the chance of forgetting all about it for a while is very very high.*

2) Date

How many times have you heard to date your spouse? Maybe around 27,462? Am I close?

There is a reason we hear about this everywhere. It’s sort of (ok.. super) important.

We do need to continue to date our spouses. 

And what it really is about is connection. 

Carving out time together is not always easy. I get it. 

But dating your spouse needs to be non-negotiable. 

Not to mention that it is fun. And we could all use more fun in our lives. 

I also highly suggest going tech-free during this time. 

Here are some date night ideas if you feel stumped. Oh, and these are my go-to at-home date night ideas!

Also, my husband and I recently stumbled upon these TableTopics. They are the perfect way to spark some new and interesting conversations. 

3) Don’t Forget About Yourself

Want to build the best marriage possible?

It starts with you.

Make yourself a priority. Take care of yourself. Love yourself first.

So often we enter a relationship and somehow forget that we are a person too. We are still a complete person separate from the relationship. 

Have your own life. And encourage your partner to do the same.

4) Communication is EVERYTHING

I know I mentioned marriage meetings earlier. And those are centered all around communication.

But communication is so crucial that it has to be talked about twice. It deserves to be talked about twice. 

You will never regret consistently prioritizing communication. Never. 

Take a deeper look at communication here!

5) Comparison 

Here is something I know to be true. 

Comparing does not help us. It does not help our relationships. 

But it sure can hurt us…and it can definitely hurt our relationships. 

Don’t spend too much of your time looking at or admiring other marriages.

Now, I do think it can be helpful to notice small things about other marriages and let those things inspire you.

At times, there are things about another relationship that can motivate you or move you to make a change or try something new. This is great. This is positive. 

The sad truth, however, is that most times that we see the good in another marriage, we are simultaneously seeing the bad in our own. 

This is when problems start to arise. This is when the way we see our own marriage can become very skewed.

Your time will be much better spent focusing on and working on the relationship you are actually in. 

6) Kindness

This is not about plastering a smile on your face all the time. 

But kindness (in all its forms) can easily take a backseat in marriages. It’s not always the frontman running the show. That’s for sure. 

We can often treat those closest to us the worst. Sad but very true.

And it makes sense. We feel comfortable with these people. We don’t feel the need to act any certain way for them.

But nobody wants to be a punching bag. At least not regularly.

This seems like a simple idea. But not so simple when it comes to the execution. 

How am I treating my spouse? How am I talking to them? You know, during all those daily interactions. 

Ask yourself these questions. And then really think about the answers.

For the record, errors and blunders are human. No one is perfect. 

The key is to try our best. (and then apologize when we inevitably screw up)

7) Gratitude

What is gratitude? It is defined as the quality of being thankful. A readiness to show appreciation.

Appreciate each other. Be grateful for what the other brings to the marriage and also for the things each of you does. 

This doesn’t mean you drop meaningless compliments left and right. That might get a little weird.

Over time, taking our spouses for granted can definitely start to happen. Maybe not intentionally. But it can happen. 

People want to feel valued. They want to feel as if someone notices them. Someone sees them.

And this is where gratitude, if present consistently, can work wonders.

Grab a gratitude journal and keep it next to your bed, the coffee machine, or even the toilet (just not shoved in the back of the junk drawer). The point is to keep it out in the open with the hopes that you can begin to make writing in it a habit. 

Think of marriage as a sliding scale from pretty easy to really freaking hard. Life happens and that scale moves. Sometimes for the better. Sometimes not. 

A strong and stable marriage can withstand the impact if that scale moves a little closer to the difficult end. 

And the real kicker is that a strong marriage can thrive no matter where it happens to be sitting on that scale at any given time. 

Have any advice on how to build a strong marriage? Please share!

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How To Build a Strong Marriage: 7 Things To Consider

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