How To Have A Happy Marriage

How To Have A Happy Marriage

how to have a happy marriage

Happy Marriage Tips

Looking for some advice on how to have a happy marriage? Aren’t we all?

Let’s get one thing out of the way. Fairy tale marriages do not exist.

But you know what does exist? Happy marriages. Really, truly happy marriages.

Healthy marriages.

Strong marriages.

Put your focus on how to have a happy marriage!

Isn’t that the goal we are all trying to achieve? To feel happy and secure within our marriage. We want a sturdy foundation in our relationship.

This does not mean every day will be amazing. This does not mean things will always be easy. And this definitely does not mean it won’t take work. It does!

I like the word effort a little more than the word work. It takes effort to make things great.

Every single couple goes through hard times.

They have ups and downs. They have disagreements.

It is how they deal with the bad times. And how grateful they are for the good times.

Are you on the hunt for the secret sauce? There isn’t one. I know, bummer. I am a sucker for a good sauce.

Looking for a way to get off the relationship struggle bus?

Ready to turn off cruise control and take control?

These tips are like little secrets of a happy marriage!

What kind of marriage do you want? And what are you going to do to get there?

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Here Are 17 Simple Tips on How to Have a Happy Marriage

1) Make Time For Each Other

Most people have a lot on their plate.

People are busy. I don’t even like using that word. It can be so frustrating when someone always says they are busy.

But a lot of people are juggling a lot of different things. Work and family life are only two categories and they take up a lot of time. Not to mention all the other parts of life getting thrown in the mix.

But making time for your marriage should be non-negotiable.

Happy couples always make time for each other. It doesn’t have to be hours and hours. They make time where they can find it.

2) Make The Most Of Your Time Together

This is piggybacking on #1!

You have to make the most of your time. I used to think my husband and I needed an entire day out together or it didn’t count.

Well, that is not realistic. We don’t always have 8 hours alone.

But we do have an hour some days. Even a few hours!

Got an hour. Go out for coffee. Grab lunch together.

Maybe you only have 20 minutes at night sometimes. Ok. Make the most of whatever time you have.

It is all about quality over quantity!

how to have a better marriage

3) Put The Phone Down

Safe to say no one wants to talk to someone who is staring directly at their phone. This infuriates me!

We are on our phones so much. And I think people sometimes do this without even noticing. Our phones are like another limb.

When you are with your partner, put your phone away. Feeling like you are competing with a dang cell phone is not a good feeling.

My husband gets work calls quite often. And texts.

If he needs to take a phone call or answer a text he will communicate this to me. Not just stare at his phone and pretend he is listening.

I am willing to wait because I want and deserve his full attention.

4) Speak Openly

Basically, this is a nice way of saying disagreements.

If you are not having disagreements, one person may be holding things in.

You should not have to walk on eggshells around your partner.

Have healthy discussions. Simple as that.

You have to read these tips on improving communication!

5) Watch Your Words

Speak respectfully. It can be hard to always catch yourself in the heat of the moment.

But once words come out, they can’t be put back.

Being mean can feel good at the moment but the repercussions aren’t so great.

6) Show Affection

Give hugs. Kiss. Hold hands.

I love holding hands. It is such a small and simple thing. But those little things make all the difference.

You don’t need to be jumping each other’s bones every second. But a kiss on the cheek or slap on the behind never hurt anybody.

how to have a better marriage

7) Make Time For Yourself

Yes, you are in a relationship. But you are still your own person.

Don’t lose yourself.

“Me” time is important.

Starting this blog was a huge way I did something for myself!

8) Don’t Keep Score

Your relationship is not a game. So no need for a scoreboard.

Trying to “win” will get you nowhere.

9) Have Fun

I am a natural goofball. I basically think everything is funny.

Laugh together. Be silly together.

There is enough seriousness to go around. Nothing beats having genuine fun together.

And laughing until you make an embarrassing sound may be one of my favorite things!

have a better marriage by having fun

10) Show Kindness

Say please and thank you. And say sorry.

These are basic manners.

Just be kind. It is not hard but it is definitely something that can fall through the cracks.

11) Appreciate Each Other

In a relationship, we can sometimes just assume the other person knows how we are feeling. And maybe they do. But that doesn’t mean it doesn’t feel good to hear it out loud!

Do you appreciate how hard your partner works? Tell them.

Do you appreciate that your spouse always makes sure the toilet paper shelf is fully stocked? Definitely tell them!

12) Don’t Compare

This is a hard one. Especially considering social media.

A picture can be powerful and send you into a downward spiral.

But stay in your own lane.

Try this. When you are falling down the comparison black hole, take a step back and write down a few things you love about your relationship!

Then take a look at these tips to help you stop comparing!

13) Keep Things Private

Some things are meant to stay just between you two.

I love to share parts of my life. And I love reading about parts of other people’s lives.

But keep some things for just the two of you.

At Home Date Night Ideas

14) Don’t Push Buttons

I am guilty of this one.

I may pounce right on my husband’s buttons. Yes, I know! I really am working on it.

And you know that feeling when you do or say something that you know will get under their skin? Most of the time you want to take it back as soon as it happens. But you can’t.

Time travel would have come in handy a few times in my house.

15) Support Each Other

Be supportive. Even when you may not like the idea. Even if you think it is not the best decision.

Sometimes, it’s best to let them see it through. Help guide them through instead of stepping in.

Another important note. If something happens to not work out as planned for them, don’t rub it in. No need to start with the “I told you so” line.

16) Know Your Love Languages

I am always looking for ways to bring this up. I stumbled upon a book about love languages at the library and it changed the game!

That’s how awesome it is. Like when you find the most comfortable pair of jeans and feel the need to tell everyone. I mean, good jeans are hard to find!

In this book, you will learn about the 5 different ways people give and receive love. These ways are through words of affirmation, quality time, receiving gifts, acts of service, and physical touch.

The book dives into each category in detail. And there is a quiz to find out your and your partner’s love language.

This book is amazing and had a huge impact on my marriage! Here are some other really awesome marriage books that are definitely worth the read!

17) Do Relationship Tune-Ups

Things will not always be rainbows and sunshine.

But happy couples pick up on this and they do something about it.

Maybe the issue is something as simple as desperately needing a date night

Or maybe it is something deeper. But when things are feeling a little off, happy couples do something about it.

P.S. Next time you do have a date night, these TableTopics are great for sparking some fresh and fun conversations!

Let me say this again. 

Happy couples are not happy all the time. No one is a robot. We are humans. And there are two people in a relationship. Chances are both of you will not be on your game 100% of the time.

But you are a team. Don’t forget that!

Check out Marriage Fitness with Mort Fertel for a deeper look at ways to help your marriage!

Do you have any tips on how to have a happy marriage? I would love to hear them!

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How To Have A Happy Marriage

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3 responses to “How To Have A Happy Marriage”

  1. Elora Canne Avatar

    This resonates so much with me! Great article and I love how easily you set it out for reading.

  2. Dawn Avatar

    My tip is put your relationship before the kids. Sounds selfish to some. But it’s why my first marriage didn’t work out. My marriage now is God first then my spouse and then the kids and everyone else after them. I heard on a radio show that in second marriages the kids from previous marriages come first. That’s prob why there’s more divorces in second marriages. But I firmly believe that you need to take care of each other and then make sure kids are taking care of second. I love all of your tips and I love Five Love Languages book. I recommend it to anyone struggling.

    1. Chelsey Avatar

      Yes! That is a great tip! I used to think of that as selfish but if you really think about it.. it makes total sense. You two are the foundation so you have to keep it strong! Thanks for stopping by!

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