5 Simple Ideas To Improve Your Marriage
How To Improve My Marriage With My Husband
This is all about ideas to improve your marriage.
And I don’t know about you, but this is a topic I myself have searched for quite often.
What can I say? I’m a marriage info junkie.
Whether you are mildly obsessed with all things marriage related or are just looking to dip your toes in the water, these tips will hopefully pique your interest.
Enough of my jabbering. Let’s get to it!
Many times, we assume something has to be wrong for us to even think about improving in any capacity.
But that’s not it at all.
Preventative maintenance is a big deal in relationships. (and really all areas of our lives)
When we make our marriages a priority on a consistent basis, then we give that relationship better odds of being fulfilling and successful.
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Here Are 5 Seriously Helpful Ideas To Improve Your Marriage
1) Do a Deep Dive into…
So often we just look at the relationship as this one entity.
But you are a separate person apart from that entity. And you play a pretty crucial role in how that relationship functions.
Focusing on ourselves might not always seem like the obvious choice. We tend to examine all the ins and out of the relationship.
It’s vital to take a closer look at your habits and choices. The way you respond to situations.
Look at what you bring to the table.
And let’s make it very clear that this is not in any way, shape, or form about you criticizing yourself and taking the blame for any aspects of your relationship that you feel need a little extra attention.
This is about making sure you can look at the “we” but also look at the “me” in your life.
Working on ourselves can only do good things for our marriage. I mean, personal growth is popular for a reason.
If you are into books, I highly suggest you get your hands on this one. And here’s another one that will not disappoint.
You are a team.
And if the balance of the team is off, then things might not run as smoothly as we would like them to.
I am not at all saying that things have to be 50/50 all the time for a relationship to be successful. That’s not realistic at all.
And I don’t like to measure marriages by standards like that.
The point is that you are both on the same team. You both are most likely working toward similar goals.
I know when a marriage hits a rough spot, it’s easy to view our partner as the enemy or feel as if they are out to get us. It’s like two people butting heads. Going against each other on a loop.
This is the perfect time to view your partner as a really good teammate. Someone that wants the best for you, themselves, and the relationship.
Go with the assumption that your partner has good intentions.
Tackling challenges together (as a team!) is definitely the way to go.
Also, grace and understanding can and will go a long way. For you and your partner.
3) Always Work on Communication
Don’t ever take good communication for granted.
Things don’t normally jump from absolutely amazing to really bad overnight. This is why it is so important to be sure to touch base regularly and keep those lines of communication open.
One way to do this is by checking in with each other on a regular basis. Two words…
Marriage meetings. Which are, as you can guess, meetings to talk about your marriage.
It’s not glamorous but it is a helpful tool your marriage can deeply benefit from.
Here are some simple and practical ways to work on communication in your marriage.
4) Carve out Time For Each Other
Always do this.
Even when it feels hard. Even when it feels impossible.
Relationships can start to feel as if they are functioning on autopilot. (I know my marriage has experienced this)
We are just going through the motions. Doing all the things that need to get done. And to be quite honest, it just feels like spending quality time together is something that can take a backseat.
We may not even feel the repercussions of this right off the bat. They won’t hit us hard. Until they do.
Listen up. I am not going to lecture you on always having date nights that involve leaving the house. Nope.
In a perfect world, my husband and I would go out on a date bi-weekly or even weekly if we could swing it. But that’s not my reality.
My family and I just moved to Tennessee. And this is our 3rd move in 3 years. We do not have any village here to help. (I’m obviously hoping to build one over time)
Also, babysitters are expensive.
So, do we just accept what is and become miserable ships passing in the night? (not a very appealing decision)
I say do what you can, when you can, and with what you got.
Schedule some at-home date nights. This can be super low-key or you can go all out every once in a while and get fancy. (and by fancy I mean maybe throw on a pair of earrings and some lipstick)
If you are looking for something fun you can do while sitting on the couch that doesn’t involve the television, check out these TableTopics. You get over 100 cards that are meant to spark fun and interesting conversations.
Or you could read a marriage book together. Ok, that might be a stretch. But I do recommend finding out each others’ love language.
5) Stay in Your Lane
Comparing is human nature. And none of us are immune to it.
But comparing your relationship to someone else’s is like inviting a complete stranger into your home. You don’t know this person at all. So why would you let them in?
You wouldn’t! (I’m just guessing here but I have watched way too much Dateline to ever do this)
One thing that I know to be true is that none of us fully know what goes on in another marriage. We simply do not know the intricate ins and outs of how another relationship functions.
Comparison causes you to grade your marriage based on an unrealistic scale. And this will inevitably create fractures in your relationship.
These fractures based on assumptions will damage your marriage over time.
I do like the idea of gaining inspiration from another relationship. But still, make sure to remind yourself that comparison is almost always not based on facts.
Relationships are not compromised of endlessly blissful days. We all know marriage is not a walk in the park.
Do we wish it was? (I do)
But then again, I think real growth and thriving in relationships come from hitting rough waters every now and then. *And coming together to get through them*
If you feel like your marriage may need some extra guidance or support, Marriage Fitness with Mort Fertel is a great resource worth looking into.
Have any thoughts when it comes to ideas to improve your marriage?
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