13 Things You Should Stop Saying
Raise your hand if you have told someone you were fine when you were clearly not. Looked in the mirror and said some not so kind words about yourself.
Any of this sounding familiar?
How about my personal favorites. Drum roll, please. Whatever. And of course, I don’t care. These used to be my go-to responses. I have no thoughts other than the word whatever. I don’t care. That’s all my brain can come up with?!
We need to stop saying these things. Well, TRY to stop saying these things!
Negative self-talk is a beast. Change that self-talk lady. How nice would it be to have an inner critic that was on our side? At least most of the time. Let’s be realistic. A pity party every now and again is bound to happen.
And I guarantee others do not want to hear your negative word vomit constantly. Negative energy is like a black cloud that tries hard as heck to block the sun.
This list is made up of things that I found myself saying all the time. And nothing positive was coming from them. They were words that opened a door to more and more negativity. Kind of like eating something that you know is bad for you but once you start you just can’t stop. Dang you chips and cookies!
One phrase leads right into the next. And before you know it you say these things without even a second thought.
We gotta do better.
You are a kick-butt woman. Treat yourself like it. Talk like it.
P.S. I still say all of these things. I am just much more aware of it and give myself an imaginary slap in the face. Snap out of it and move on. If you are having an exceptionally rough day maybe try a real slap.
You got this!
Here Are 13 Things You Should Stop Saying .. or at least try to
1) I’m fine.
It is no secret that someone saying they are fine does not always mean they are fine. This is the other “f” word in my book!
If you are not fine then don’t say you are. Let me go write that on a post-it!
But really why does everyone say it. It is such a neutral description of how we are feeling.
I am in no way saying you should share every detail of your life with every person that asks you how you’re doing. Different relationships call for different levels of sharing. At least for most people. We all know an over-sharer or two.
But we should be able to have honest and real conversations with those closest to us. And also we need to be honest with ourselves. Don’t fool yourself into thinking you are fine. We are complex creatures and everything will come out eventually.
Now, if you happen to like this word and really are fine then drop this f-bomb as much as you’d like!
2) I don’t have time.
We all have the same 24 hours in a day. For me, this comes down to I don’t want to do something. Or even more likely is I don’t want to deal with a situation.
Time is not the real issue. I am just hiding behind the excuse of time.
Putting something off can give some relief in a short term time frame. But we know the long term is another story.
Easier said than done. Girl, I know. I am right there on the front lines fighting this battle regularly.
But I am in control of my time. And so are you.
3) I have a million things to do.
A million? I don’t even think the busiest person in the world has a million things to do. Saying this just puts me in a bad state of mind.
I am a list lover. I have made a list or two or a couple hundred in my life. And there have never been a million things on them.
Maybe your list is long. I know mine is sometimes and it can feel overwhelming. But take it one thing at a time.
And if you start to feel like there are a million things on your list then take a second and actually count. Count how many things you really have to get done.
Having 22 things to do is a heck of a lot less than a million.
4) I’m too busy.
Okay, obviously being busy is a very real thing. I’m not taking anything away from people that have very jam-packed days.
But I found myself saying this and then still spending (way too much) time scrolling through Instagram. Wasn’t too busy for that. Where my Instagram lovers at?
Most people are not actually that busy. They just say it.
Maybe we use it as an excuse to get out of doing something we don’t want to do. Maybe we think that saying how busy we are is a direct connection to how full our lives are.
This goes right back to you choose how you spend your time. Don’t miss out on opportunities or experiences that come along because you were too busy.
This is, however, a perfectly acceptable thing to say when the weird man at the grocery store asks you what you’re doing later. Say this and walk away as quickly as possible.
5) Whatever
Ugh! This word.
You are better off saying nothing.
This word used to be my jam. And to be honest, there are still days it rolls off my tongue a little too easily. And that is okay. I’m working on it.
But don’t let this word become one of your favorites. It does not deserve a spot on your most used words list.
Behind every whatever that comes out of my mouth, there is actually a 20-minute long rant. My husband might prefer whatever. But the rant is always the follow-up.
6) I’m so(insert negative word)
Why are we so hard on ourselves?
My spirit has been shattered by watching a tutorial for the perfect messy bun and my end result is a head full of knots. My not so perfect messy bun and I start spewing negative words like nobody’s business.
All over a bun. Someone else makes it look so easy and here I am having a mini meltdown.
When things go wrong why do we always find a way to insult ourselves.
No thank you. How about we treat ourselves the way we would treat a friend. Honest and supportive. No rude commentary needed.
I have not fully given up on those dang hair tutorials. But when it doesn’t work out I just throw my hair in a ponytail and that’s that.
7) I can’t do this.
Why not? It can be so easy to sell ourselves short.
We can do it. Maybe it is fear talking. Doubt creeping in and getting very comfortable up in our heads. We get pushed out of our comfort zone and our brains tell us to hold up woman! Go grab some snacks and sit back down on the couch. Take the easy road.
No way. Push yourself. Fake it until you make it.
Have you ever looked at everything someone has accomplished and thought how easy it was for them? We are only seeing the results. Not the hard work and the issues they have gone through. We aren’t in their heads. Maybe they have just as many, if not more, moments of doubt than you do.
I am easily discouraged and have to talk myself up in my head constantly. This is what I have to do. I choose to do this rather than choosing to believe I can’t do something.
8) I can’t handle this.
You can. I guarantee you have said these words before. And you know what you did. You handled it! I bet you handled it like a boss!
Hot dang life can be hard. And stressful and scary and exhausting. It can also be exciting and surprising and straight up amazing.
We all deal with the good, the bad and the ugly. Like going to the grocery store with children. This would fall into the bad or maybe even the ugly category depending on the day.
We can and often do handle more than we think is possible. You are out there killin it. Keep it up. We are all superstars.
9) What’s wrong with me?
Let me tell you what is wrong with you. Absolutely nothing.
We are so good at finding faults in what we do and how we do things. A situation turns out differently than we expected and we assume it’s our fault in some way.
Something must be wrong with us. A pair of jeans isn’t flattering and we start bashing our body.
Don’t even think about making a mistake. What is wrong with you?
How about what is right with you. Let’s flip the script!
10) I’m old.
I think I have been saying this since I turned 30! Probably even before.
Time can seem like it is flying by. But why is age so important anyway.
Someone who is 30 and not married with kids is looked at as a rare species. Why do we have such specifications for what we should be doing at certain ages?
You do you at any age. I’m gonna rock my 30’s.
11) I don’t care.
This used to be my go to when my husband and I were discussing pretty much anything. Where should we go for dinner? What show should we watch on TV tonight? I don’t care. Lame. That’s the best I got?
No, I just got so used to saying it that it came out of my mouth naturally. Kind of similar to a cow saying moo.
I have an opinion. Duh! We all do.
Share your thoughts. I don’t care is not an answer.
12) I have no clothes.
This is me while staring at a full closet. Do I walk around naked every day? Obviously not.
Sometimes, I do have a heck of a time figuring out what to wear. But this has much more to do with confidence and not the number of clothing options.
This may seem like a silly one but these words hold power.
Say you are getting ready for a date night and start getting flustered over what to wear. The night has not even really begun and things are going downhill. Stop. Halt. Take a step back. Do not let clothes win this battle.
My wardrobe has the power to make or break me some days. This is part of the reason why I try on everything I buy and if I don’t love it then I don’t get it.
This means a smaller wardrobe but it also means choosing an outfit won’t take 2 hours and cause 3 panic attacks.
13) I’ll do it later.
Will you? Are you going to do it later or put it off for who knows how long? Later becomes tomorrow. Before you know it, 19 tomorrows have come and gone.
Procrastination is a pesky little thing.
Do you have a boatload of things you have been putting on the back burner? How about picking one that you really want to get done. Maybe it is starting a project that intimidates you. This was me when it came to starting a blog.
It can be anything.
Start small. But just start.
Think about the things you are saying. Work on putting positive words into the world.
Do you say any of these things?
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